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Invite me to your party                                   Return to Poems

Invite me to your party

So I don’t crash your gate

I promise to be hearty

I’ll not turn up late

 

Invite me to your party

Give me the wink and nod

Don’t think I will be naughty

I’m a happy little sod

 

Invite me to your party!

I need to have some fun

Invite me to your party!

I know your having one

 

Invite me to your party!

Don't leave me off your list

Invite me to your party!

I won't get fucking pissed

 

I promise to be sociable

to chat and just sip wine

I won't be unapproachable

like I was last time

 

No pizzas used as frisbees

No vol-au-vents or sauce

Thrown at the over- fifties

No drumsticks up the arse

 
Invite me to your party
I promise I will come
I won’t bring anybody else
Just me and your mum
 
Invite me to your party
You never know your luck
Or you can send me twenty quid
And I won't bother turning up
 
Invite me to your party
I don't want to Pester
Send the Invitation to
Doc Hannibal Lector
 
Invite me to your party
Don't tell the flying squad
I'll bring along the meat pies
Your best friend Sweeney Todd
 
Invite me to your party
Give me one last chance
My hands will cease to wander
And my cock stays in my pants
 
If I come to your party
I'll really try my best
and if you do I promise you
I'll wear more than my vest
 
Invite me to your party
Come on don't be a louse

When all is said and done

The party's at my house!